My English portfolio

December 5, 2007                                                                                                                       

Portfolio Committee

English Department

Humboldt State University

Arcata, CA 95521-8299

Dear Portfolio Readers:

Throughout this semester of English 100, I have found a style of writing that I enjoy the most because of the freedom I was granted.  I enjoy writing about my culture and past events that have molded me into the person I currently am.  Two of the three submissions focus heavily on my cultural background, while the third submission focuses more so on my morals and values.  All three papers are similar in the sense that all speak of my past and how it has shaped who I am today.  My submission, “ABC? Not So Easy as One, Two, Three” came first in order because that paper spoke of my confusion with American and Asian cultures during my youth and also because I felt it fit chronologically.  The next submission, “Chiva…what?” talked about my luck with using chivalry as a courtship tool and also contained a small section about my years in high school, which would fit in next chronologically.  My final submission, “Do Not Pho With My Culture” discusses the importance of Vietnamese cuisine and came last because I felt the epiphany discussed in the conclusion has an ending tone to it.

Of the three submissions, my strongest is “ABC? Not So Easy as One, Two, Three,” as I feel it lets readers truly see me.  The paper speaks heavily of my culture while blending in with my upbringing and the values and morals that come with both.  I feel very proud of this paper because I feel it represents the alienation of cultures which many minorities feel here at Humboldt State University.  In order for a person to be a productive member of society, I believe they should be at peace with themselves.  In my opinion, for one to be at peace, one must understand their cultural past and be able to find enough balance in order to move forward.  This lesson plays heavy importance especially with those of mixed cultures.  I have a personal connection with this piece because it clarifies my cultural past and helped me find balance during a time of confusion here at college.

The first drafts of all my papers contained the general idea of what was to come; however, they all lacked in-depth detail.  In “Do Not Pho With My Culture,” my first draft did not contain heavy details about the eating habits of Vietnam or comparison to other cuisines.  The first draft of “Chiva…what?” contained no analysis of the media’s role for the absence of chivalry.  Revisions added description and reasoning behind many subjects brought up in these papers.

All of my papers went through this same process of revision.  When the assigned draft was due, I wrote the paper like a waterfall, letting everything flow.  By the second draft, I began to look for concrete evidence to support my paper.  All the information I found on the internet helped me with “Do Not Pho With My Culture.”  For “ABC? Not So Easy as One, Two, Three” a lot of my material came from personal experiences, so I had to sit down and write my thoughts in a way that I could refer to them later.  For this method of organization, I used a web diagram to see the chain of events and what led to another.  Finally, for the last draft, I began filtering information I did not see fit and altered certain sentences to avoid repetition.

As a whole, this portfolio demonstrates my creativity and skills as a writer.  The topics I chose to write about are unique in the sense that most people would have no prior knowledge of the topic.  My assumption of my audience’s previous knowledge led me to write in a way in which I describe events and items with great detail.  The essays should also reflect my skills as a critical thinker.  For example, in “Chiva…what?” the topic of chivalry was brought up and my writing explained why I think this code is becoming extinct.

With positive aspects I see in my own writing, there lie some weaknesses to my writing.  In “ABC? Not So Easy as One, Two, Three” and “Chiva…what?,” I believe I got caught up with my own personal experiences a bit too much.  All of my essays touch upon who I am as a person and culturally.  These experiences definitely have a strong connection to me, which is why I can write so vividly about them.  However, the essays could have used a bit more factual backing.  So, in order for me to strengthen my essays, I had to take a step back to examine all of my essays with heavy scrutiny.  I asked some of my room mates and my tutors to read my rough drafts over and tell me what sections they thought contained weaknesses.  With their advice, I either completely cut sections from my essays or edited them heavily.

Throughout this semester of English, I have taken one major risk: writing about myself.  Through my high school writing career, I did not bother writing about myself because I felt uncomfortable telling others of my past.  However, I realized the past made me the person I am today.  The freedom of this class has allowed me to express myself in a well organized manner.  Writing about myself allows me to be self reflective and understand my actions.  The result of this risk I took helped me produce three well written essays that tell readers of my culture.

When I began assembling this portfolio, I thought of myself evolving as a writer.  Many surprises hit me this semester when I first started turning in my papers.  My teachers in high school turned a blind eye to incorrect formatting.  On a college level, the Modern Language Association’s norm of formatting is closely followed.  The college level jump really surprised me a lot but, as a result, my writing skills have improved dramatically.  In high school, I could get away with writing short, choppy sentences but, here at Humboldt teachers would mark my papers suggesting changes.  At first, I took these suggestions somewhat personally however; I soon realized through correction of these errors, I strengthened myself as a writer.

A good writer can express his or her mind very eloquently on paper.  Unfortunately, words can take on different meanings and be interpreted differently.  Upon finishing my essays, I hope readers get a sense of my cultural pride.  Portfolio readers should get an idea of what my personality would be like if they were to meet me.  Through these submissions, I have painted an image of myself using only words which makes me feel proud of myself.  I wrote my essays in a playful, informative tone with a string of humor which I hope you portfolio readers enjoy.

Sincerely,

886

                                                                                                                                            December 5, 2007

ABC?  Not So Easy as One, Two, Three

When most people hear the letters ABC, they seem to think about a famous Jackson Five song or the beginning of the alphabet.  Mention the exact same letters to a first generation Chinese born in America and they will tell you the letters stand for American Born Chinese.  ABC’s have a unique sense of identity, as they cannot completely label themselves Asian or American.  This struggle of identity throughout my upbringing has transformed me into the person I am today.  Originally I thought of ABC as a derogatory term, but now I take pride in labeling myself as one.  Despite the internal battle of finding the balance between the two cultures, I am thankful for this beautiful struggle for making me aware of who I am.

During the first couple years of my life, I did not speak a lick of English.  My mother completely immersed me in Asian culture.  Even though I cannot exactly remember thinking in my native language of Teochew, I know I did.  When my mother showed me photographs and family videos of when I was younger, memory lapses just started coming back and flooded my mind of forgotten times.  I saw photographs of a chubby Asian boy who I did not seem to recognize until my mother told me, “That’s you!”  All around the chubby boy, who I barely recognized, lay scattered pieces of bright red, plastic paper and dyed red eggs.  I never remembered wearing a bow tie until I saw a picture of me in one.  I began wondering about why my bowtie, along with ninety percent of the picture, was red. 

Seeing the photograph of a boy with a smile reaching ear to ear and being completely surrounded by red, I remember being the happiest Asian kid.  Being oddly curious as I gazed further for deeper details, I asked my mother, “Is red your favorite color?”  She simply responded, “Of course it is and it should be every Chinese person’s favorite color because it symbolizes good luck and the strong bond of blood relations.”  After this conversation, many things my mother said finally began absorbing into my brain like a dry sponge soaking up water.  Although my mother’s proverbs made no sense literally, they held great moral values that the Asian culture hold dear.

“Wah gah lai luu gah lai” translates into my home is your home and teaches lessons of kindness.  Whenever I did something that really annoyed my mother she would scream, “Kah siu joi wah!” which literally translates to “feet hands too much!”  While not moralistically rich in value, I never forgot that saying because I heard it way too often.  While most parents had to deal with their children growing up and leaving them, my mother had to deal with my cultural upbringing.  She knew that I would never be completely Chinese, nor would I be completely American, but she made sure I would never forget my heritage.

My introduction to American culture started sadly with a relationship with television.  By watching episodes of Power Rangers, I slowly began tasting the English language.  Television skewed my image of what a happy, content life entailed.  Through a blaring, neon screen, I believed a good life included countless action figures and enough sugar to make child’s eyes roll back.  The media promotes and condones mass consumption which at the time seemed desirable.  American culture is a rich melting pot, although a bit bloody.  Do not get me wrong, as I believe American culture is worth absorbing, just not through television.

Soon through school, I became aware of another culture.  Most of the kids I met in school shared the first generation struggle I was familiar with.  Like me, they ate up whatever television spat out.  A lot of my friends from younger days have unfortunately drifted away because as we grew older, we began thinking differently about our cultural values and morals.  I think part of my mom knew she would eventually have let me make my own decisions in regards to culture and heritage, but she was never ready to let go. 

Fortunately, I have four older siblings and they understood the internal struggle I underwent.  My oldest sister Phuong played the role of the strict sister, as my mother did not have the heart to yell at the youngest child of the family.  As the youngest child, I detested my oldest sister, for she made sure my mom did not give in to my childish begging and screaming.  She would force me to learn math and spelling way ahead of my grade level.  Looking back, I am truly thankful to have such a caring older sister.  She made sure I had the skills to succeed and also to embrace the American culture without completely forgetting our own heritage.  The most important words she ever uttered to me were, “Let’s face it.  You’re never gonna be completely white.  I’m not telling you to be completely Asian either.  You can’t ‘cause you’re here in America.  What I am trying to tell you is to find balance.  Not just in cultures either, but in life in general.”  I hold this lesson dear to my heart because I live by it. 

Through my eighteen years of life, I have been living a balanced life for about two years.  My mom immersed me in Asian culture as a young child, then through the tube I adored American culture.  By the time Phuong married, her husband taught me to hold onto my Asian side.  He told me to study and practice filial piety.  During these times, my social life went downhill as I became the aristocratic super nerd who believed he was that damn smart.  It was only middle school, but I spent three hours a night studying.  A person of that age should have wasted away time flying kites in fields of grass or staring senselessly into a monitor of some sort.  During the summer of my eighth grade year, my sister divorced him.  She told me his lessons held some value but he was too extreme then, grades no longer had number one priority in my life.  I began socializing and before I knew it my life had completely switched over, this time to a more balanced middle. 

With balance, I began making new friends, getting jobs, and just finding life more enjoyable.  After making friends through two jobs, I opened myself more to relationships.  Just as long as people had an open mind, I attempted to befriend them.  The most important lesson of this renaissance era of my life was to be open-minded.  At the center, I could see both ends and why each side held certain values higher than the other.  For example, Asian culture holds importance to helping elders as they helped you, while American culture seems to promote individualism.  These two cultures’ values conflict with each other, but from where I stood, the conflict made sense and I found the solution.  Up until this point, I truly believe this is the way to live my life because I feel comfortable.  Once I started college, I thought about how the second generation would be raised.  Much like my mother, I fear the loss of my Asian culture.  As for my own children and how I will raise them, only time will tell.

December 5, 2007

Chiva…what?

            Ask any woman in America, “Do you think chivalry still exists in our world?” and most will shake her head in dismay.  This saddening response can only be worsened when women counter by responding, “What does chivalry mean?”  The lack of chivalry can probably be attributed to our rising divorce rates.  Many men no longer abide by this chivalrous code of conduct because of the way the media presents relationships and gender roles.  As a result, women seem to trust the wrong men more often.  This dying code of conduct needs to be revived before everyone believes the norm includes acting like a jerk and disrespecting people.

            Look back to any fairy tale and one will probably notice the cliché of a prince charming rescuing a damsel in distress.  The prince undoubtedly acted very nobly and did no wrong.  These stories may have been farfetched with dragons and magical beings, but they do hold a certain importance.  The messages and morals presented in these tales represented what people of that time regarded as standard conduct.  What happened to those knights in shining armor?  Unfortunately, times have changed people and their ways of behaving.  By properly raising a person, I believe we can, one person at a time, bring chivalry back into modern times.

            I try my best to preserve this code because growing up with a family of three sisters made me realize the importance of treating women right.  Growing up without a father figure also added to how I acted around women.  All three of my sisters are older and have gone through many relationships.  Sadly, some of these relationships were plagued with arguments and one ended with divorce.  I never thought in my lifetime that I would have to witness two divorces in my family as both my oldest sister and mother divorced.  Seeing my sisters depressed and sad made me incredibly angry.  Of course, my feelings are biased, because those closest to my heart were very hurt.  The men’s perspective in these conflicts never really dawned on me at the time, but came to realize both my sisters and their respective boyfriends did wrong.  Still, as I grew up I told myself I would not behave like the jerks that have made my sisters shed tears. 

My family experiences are not the only place I draw inspiration from, but school as well.  Many classmates from high school hooked up for the sake of sucking face but they shared no love.  These make-do relationships last no longer than a month as the couple begins to learn more and more about each other.  I have seen the males from these relationships flake out on dates, not hold doors open, and disrespect their dates in general.  The things I have seen disgust me, which is why I feel it is important to treat women correctly.  With this upbringing, I have paid for meals, held doors open, and kept conversations alive without awkwardness.  These actions come naturally, and I expect nothing in return except maybe a “thank you.”

Part of the reason I strive to keep this conduct alive is because for the most part women have been mistreated throughout history.  The way I treat the opposite sex does not come on a silver platter.  With positive things come negative things too.  As much as I want chivalry to take over the world, I realize there must be balance.  For example, if the world had no jerks, chivalrous men would not stand out.  Also, the women’s right movement gave a lot of independence to women.  This new found independence somewhat gave women more power to choose their mates.  All I ask for is a more balanced ratio of chivalrous men.  The negative effects of this conditioning have pushed me to pursue a girl with little results. 

Throughout high school, there was one girl I have cared for immensely.  I showered this girl with flowers, movies, earrings, and dinners at fancy restaurants.  I made sure she never paid, which led me to many fake trips to the bathroom to cover the check without her knowing.  For Valentine’s Day, I learned how to make truffles and made a batch for her.  On a sadder note, I asked her to be my date for three important school dances and all three were turned down with terrible excuses such as: “I have to study.” or “My parents do not want me out late.”  The week before I left to Humboldt, we both sort of ignored each other because of awkwardness.  Depression took over for quite a while following the split.  We spoke the night before I left but have not really spoken since then.  This situation would drive most chivalrous men to become jerks.  Luckily, due to my upbringing, I realized that we were both at fault.  She had no experience with relationships and did not know how to end the relationship without hurting my feelings, which in turn led me to keep chasing her.  As much as I would like to believe chivalry lies solely within men, I noticed women play a huge role as well.  Noticing couples over the course of my adolescent years, I have seen that in healthy relationships, both partners play an equal role.

Many theories float about attempting to explain the loss of chivalry in our modern age.  My strongest belief lies in the fact that peoples’ values and morals change over time.  Take a look at ninety percent of media.  Of course I am generalizing a bit, but pop culture and certain rap music has led this generation of men a bit confused on how to treat women.

In our current society, when a male sleeps with plenty of women, he is labeled as a pimp or a player and given credit to his name.  However, if a female were to sleep with many men, she would be titled a whore or a slut.  Human nature tells us we want to please our peers, so in theory for males to please their friends they go around adding notches to their belts and essentially disrespecting women.  Where do we get this notion of sleeping with women to gain respect?  Remember those silly AXE commercials in which a spray sends waves of women after you?  Or perhaps a James Bond movie where he sleeps with several different women every film?  Our current media sends images of what the ideal male or female needs to wear or buy.  Most advertisements use very effective techniques to make sure their messages stick to our heads.  Once ingrained into our minds, we consider them our norms and act upon them much like mindless zombies.

With a huge following all over the world especially in America, rap music is quickly taking over mainstream television and radio.  Originally, rap was a medium in which artists voiced their struggles against poor living conditions and decades of institutionalized racism.  Today, most of rap focuses heavily on the glamour of living a millionaire lifestyle with diamond encrusted teeth, expensive cars, and plenty of women.  Many of the lyrics from these songs speak heavily of performing sexual acts on multiple women and treating women like objects.  The music videos are no different either, as the main rapper is usually surrounded by women dancing with them provocatively, instilling more unrealistic norms into a male’s mind.

As much as the lack of chivalry can be attributed to males, unfortunately some blame lies with women.  After the turn of the century, the women’s rights movement radically changed how most women viewed men.  Women viewed men as their equals and began confronting them. In turn, men felt challenged, which inadvertently led to a gender war.  Amid this gender war, some honest, chivalrous men still existed.  However, most turned into jerks when they attempted to talk to women, only to be taken advantage of or shunned for trying to take advantage of a woman.  All of these events slowly led to the decline of chivalrous conduct.

At times, I feel the way I have been raised has turned me into a hopeless romantic, but I would not change a thing because I honestly believe this is the proper way to act.  By the way I live my life, tell my life experiences, and treat women, I hope I can slowly change the ratio of nice guys to jerks to a more balanced one.  It seems like chivalry is a dying code of conduct but hopefully things will change for the better as time goes on.  

December 5, 2007

Do Not Pho With My Culture

            “What the hell is pho?” (pronounced “fuh?”) my friend asked quizzically as we passed by a Vietnamese noodle shop.  “Is that like how Vietnamese people say fuck?” my friend jokingly added.  Growing up in the Bay Area, I automatically assumed all Asians had heard of pho.  Once the assumption occurred, I realized I had made an ass out of myself and my friend.  So here I am trying to spread knowledge, one reader at a time, about the cuisine of my home land.

            When most people think about Vietnamese cuisine, they seem to think of pho.  Pho, for the ignorant, consists of a rich yet clear broth, rice noodles, thin slices of beef, and accompanying vegetables.  While tasty indeed, the popular misconception is that pho encompasses all Vietnamese cuisine.  This assumption gets completely shattered when one goes to a real Vietnamese restaurant and realizes that pho does not serve as the centerpiece of the menu.  “Vietnamese cuisine can be a different and strange experience to those who have not had the pleasure of sampling the variety of foods. Fragrant, and often pungent, fresh herbs, spices, and sauces accompany many of the dishes which can either turn people off or create life-long fans. This includes cilantro, fish sauce, chilies, lemon grass, and lime/lemon juice” (“Vietnam” par. 1).  The ingredients listed should give a general idea of the flavor of Vietnamese cuisine, but it is by no means a complete list.

            Much like many other cuisines of the world, the ingredients heavily rely on the sake of convenience and availability.  “Much of Vietnam is lush and fertile due to an extensive river system, which includes the Red River Delta and the Mekong Delta. This makes it ideal for growing a wide range of vegetables and fruits, which are eaten in abundance” (Watson and Thelander par. 2).  Many westerners take second glances when they stroll through the open air markets of Vietnam as, many fruits available in Vietnam will probably never be available in the United States due to fear of crop decimation through insect plagues.  These fruits include pitaya, a bright pink fruit with white flesh and black seeds; rambutan, a fuzzy red ball with white meat; and star fruit, a fruit in which the cross section resembles a star.

Do not confuse Vietnam with a vegetarian country despite a large Buddhist population.  “Vietnam borders the ocean, and also has an extensive river system, so fish and shellfish are a staple part of the traditional Vietnamese diet. Shrimp, crab, squid, mussels and countless varieties of fish are eaten” (Watson and Thelander par. 8).  All these different types of seafood are cooked in a variety of ways and sometimes added to soup or cooked down to be used as a sauce.  Vietnamese cuisine encompasses necessity, so everything from sea and land are used to their fullest potential.  Since tropical forests cover a significant portion of Vietnam, grazing land for poultry is scarce.  “Meat such as beef has traditionally been eaten sparingly throughout Vietnam. Pork is more popular, but it is still eaten in moderation. When meat is used, a little goes a long way, such as in the popular Vietnamese beef and rice noodle soup pho bo, which uses paper thin slices of beef” (Watson and Thelander par. 10).

The moderation of meat eating probably comes from the fact that there are many religious days in which followers of Buddhism avoid consumption of meat.  Also, the avian flu virus practically destroyed the chicken industry in Vietnam.  However, consumption of chicken is slowly regaining momentum.  “Poultry such as chicken is eaten regularly and is enjoyed hot or shredded cold in salads. Eggs are typically enjoyed in moderation” (Watson and Thelander par. 11).  When eating Vietnamese chicken salad for the first time, most people are surprised of the lack of chicken.  Being a third world country, meat plays a special role of indicating either wealth or a special celebration.

            While the cuisine of Vietnam draws on many sources, it remains unique with bright, fresh flavors.  “Vietnamese cuisine has many influences including French Indian and Chinese. The French influence that is often evident in Vietnamese soups is due to the French colonization of Vietnam, which began in the 16th century and ended in the middle of the 20th century. While the Indian influence is probably due to the Buddhist religion, which is popular throughout much of Asia” (“The Cuisine of Vietnam” par. 1).  While certain dishes are very similar to Chinese or Indian dishes, the Vietnamese twist on these plates adds a flavor that makes them purely Vietnamese.  Chinese noodle soups share similarities with Vietnamese noodle soups, as both contain time intensive broths and rice noodles.  However, the Vietnamese tradition of using many fresh herbs and spices in the broth and as a condiment strikes a heavy difference between the two Asian cuisines.  While both Vietnamese and Indian cuisine offer curry, one curry tastes dramatically different from the other.  The Indian version includes different types of nuts and thickening agents which makes the curry heavier and more fulfilling, while the Vietnamese version includes coconut milk and herbs such as lemongrass.  The Vietnamese twist can be generalized as adding flavors through fresh herbs and spices because of the abundance and accessibility of the ingredients.

            As a younger child, I detested Vietnamese cuisine because of its fresh flavors.  The American media made me savor fast, greasy food like none other.  Luckily, living with my mother all my life, I slowly began appreciating the cuisine of my homeland.  Before I left to college I asked my mother to teach me how to make her legendary Vietnamese chicken salad, and that is something I would proudly share.  My mother displayed more characteristics of an artist rather than a scientist when it came to cooking, for she never used measuring utensils, so excuse the lack of measurements.  In a mixing bowl, mix equal parts rice vinegar, fish sauce, lime juice, and vegetable oil.  Toss in some garlic, sugar, a sliced up Thai chile, and a bit of black pepper.  Let the dressing sit and shred cabbage, a rotisserie chicken, and a bit of mint.  Mix the chicken, cabbage, mint and slowly add the dressing while mixing.  Add some peanuts for crunch and garnish and let the feast begin!

            As my appreciation for my cuisine grew, I slowly began realizing the importance of cooking.  Food plays a very important role, especially to a country like Vietnam.  Looking back in the Vietnamese history books, I see that many Chinese have immigrated.  Buddhist thought has managed to seep into my homeland and for four centuries, the Vietnamese have been colonized by the French.  Vietnam had many American soldiers over for a good fifteen years.  With all of these influences, it is hard for Vietnam to have a strong cultural identity of its own.  Do not get me wrong; I believe all of these other cultures have made my country stronger.  We need something to look back on to recognize how far we have come.   This something should be tangible and my answer is cuisine.  With cuisine, despite outside influences, I am reminded of my culture.

Works Cited

"Vietnam - Vietnamese Recipes." World Recipes. 3 Oct. 2007. <http://www.world-

recipes.info/vietnam-vietnamese/index.html>.

Watson, Ric and Trudy Thelander. “Vietnamese Cuisine.” Mediterrasian. 3 Oct. 2007.

<http://www.mediterrasian.com/cuisine_of_month_vietnam.htm>.

“The Cuisine of Vietnam.” Wokme. 3 Oct. 2007.

<http://www.wokme.com/cuisines/vietnamese.htm>.

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